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THE TODDLER ROADMAP SERIES 2: Episode 24 - 10 Things to Do Every Single Day as A Parent to Nurture a Happy, Confident, Resilient Toddler.

"Everything you need to raise a happy, confident, resilient toddler 
undamaged by living through a pandemic!"

In this episode:

  • ​10 Things to Do Every Single Day as A Parent To Nurture A Happy, Confident, Resilient Toddler.
  • ​Great Ideas for Keeping Toddlers Quiet on Special Public Occasions m- like Weddings & Funerals! 
  • ​14 Quick and Simple ‘Me Time’ Ideas to Recharge YOUR Batteries.
On the Parentverse: Sue is in Conversation with Laura Godfrey- Isaacs Author of ‘Maternal Journal: A creative guide to journaling through pregnancy, birth and beyond’ to promote positive mental health and wellbeing in pregnancy, birth, and parenthood.
Welcome to your last TODDLER Roadmap episode in this collection!
Gosh - what a journey we’ve been on together! I really hope you have picked up some
new ideas to try out, some different strategies and some fresh approaches to experiment
with.

Bringing up toddlers can feel like trying to tame jelly – all wobbles and no rules, but I
hope you feel far more confident in your own ability now and feel more relaxed, positive
and at ease in all the different scenarios you find yourself in.

Bringing up children is an adventure and just when you think you’ve mastered it,
something will happen to change your mind!

Parenting is a 24-hour a day, 7-day a week, 52-week a year job and it really is a roller
coaster ride full of fun, scary moments, and great memories.

Take the long term, bigger picture as this will keep you focused on what’s important in
life and not just on the challenging or tiring times you might be experiencing at the
moment.

The Importance of ‘ME TIME’ 

The concept of “me time” can be laughable and guilt-inducing for many busy mums and dads. But it’s a healthy, necessary part of modern parenting.

It’s not selfish – it’s self-care and vital to help you cope with living through these strange and challenging times of life during and after a pandemic

I coach loads of mums and dads around balancing their lives as most of us put ourselves really low on the pecking order of priorities – BUT getting a much needed rest is vital for your wellbeing, patience and sense of humour.

‘Me’ time replenishes your energy.
‘Me’ time re – charges your batteries.
‘Me’ time rejuvenates your spirit and gives you a sense of perspective.

Hey Mama, Here Are 14 Ways to Find Time for Yourself

• Ditch the guilt!
• Make chores a family affair.
• Meet up with friends without your kids!
• Phone a friend for a chat.
• Get moving – go for a walk in nature.
• Have a bath with scented candles
• Read or listen to a book or read a trashy magazine!
• STOP social media scrolling & comparing!
• Know your triggers to overwhelm and take a break
• Discover a new low key hobby
• Blast out your favourite music
• Treat yourself to your favourite meal
• Do Nothing! Breathe. Repeat
• Laugh😊

Manic Mums and Dazed Dads

Are you stuck in the spin cycle of life………….. exhausted, wrung out and dizzy?
Do you find yourself falling into bed worn out, frustrated and complaining “Where did the time GO?” 

This Guide is for you!
For the most part, the daily essentials of being a good parent come down to following
some simple principles that you can practise each and every day.

Ten Things to Do Every Single Day

1. You can never be too loving.

Whether you’ve listened to the whole of this Toddler Roadmap Podcast Series or have just dipped in and out, take this one important fact away with you - you can never be too loving with your children.
Get rid of that old wives’ tale that hugging them, holding them, or telling them you love them is spoiling them. If the world paid more attention to their children, the world would be a better and happier place.
I can think of many children who suffered because their parents were too busy, too selfish, or too preoccupied to spend time with them. I have never met a child who was worse off because their parents loved them too much. It’s just not possible.

A child won’t be harmed by being told every single day that you love them, think they are special and know they are unique.

They won’t be harmed by words that develop their self-esteem and self-confidence.

Dads don’t need to worry that too much love will interfere with their son’s masculinity or that too much kindness will make their child fragile, because when children genuinely feel loved, they develop a strong sense of security which makes them less needy.

The healthiest, most balanced adults are the ones that can express their love easily, undeniably, and unconditionally.

What some parents think is showing too much love is really just giving things in place of love - material things like i-pods or tablets, or things like leniency, lowered expectations or no limiting boundaries.
Children need plenty of physical affection - and not just when they are toddlers or little ones. We are tactile creatures, and we all have a natural need for physical contact with others. It nurtures us and sustains us in a busy, hectic, demanding IT- driven world. Children are no different.

The foundation for a strong family is the wonderful relationship between a parent and a child that is based on emotional and physical bonding not purely on the intellectual connections and expectations.

Remember

Show affection in the words you use to praise your child’s specific accomplishments when they have tried hard or have mastered something new or challenging. Nothing makes a child stand up taller than some heartfelt, genuine, specific praise from one of their parents.

Create a loving environment too for your kids to feel safe in. Don’t go overboard on the white sofa and cream carpet - let your kids feel relaxed at home where respect, affection, kindness, and warmth flow easily and naturally all around.

2. Being a role model

Have you ever noticed that you have many of the same attitudes, habits, and opinions that your parents had when you were growing up - even though you swore you’d do it differently than they did?

Well, that’s because they were your first, important role models and you are now the same to your children.
You are constantly being observed, watched, copied, and modelled by your children. You are on stage all the time - whether you know it, like it or do anything about it.

Imitating parents is a natural part of how children learn.

Perhaps you are not aware of the subtle messages you send to your children all the time - but all your actions and emotions are communicated to your kids who are constantly learning from you.

That’s why anxious parents produce anxious children and positive, confident parents bring up positive, confident kids!

Kids model your behaviour because they have an inborn desire to grow up to be just like you.

Most parents underestimate the amount their children copy what they say or do.

Just think back to a time when your young child was absorbed in their drawing or painting, and they didn’t seem to be listening, but they picked up on the tension and anxiety around you and seemed to need more cuddles after that particular phone call.

If you are polite, respectful, chatty to people and kind to others the chances are your children will turn out similarly and of course the same holds true if you are aggressive, rude, impatient and standoffish. Your children learn how to interact with people by watching you.

Words of wisdom

You can’t choose whether to be your children’s role model. You are, whether you like it or not - so why not enjoy it and be the best you can be and forgive yourself when you get it wrong sometimes. Your kids then learn it’s ok to make mistakes as long as you learn from them!!

Remember, you have the ability to influence your child's personality, interests, character, intelligence, attitudes and values. You can even influence your child’s likes and dislikes. You can influence how your child behaves at school, at home, and with friends. You can influence whether they are kind, considerate, judgmental, or selfish.

3. What you do matters!

Don't be afraid to assert authority as a parent-that's what you're there for! Rather than telling yourself you are powerless against the influence of the media or your children's friends, remember you do have a strong, guiding influence over your child.

Manage it and remember it is because of these outside influences your role is even more important. Limit your child’s TV and video games and regulate what they are allowed to watch. Remember to have clear, fair, consistent boundaries.

We all perform poorly, when we're tired, so just be aware of that and forgive yourself too. It's hard work raising a well-balanced, self-confident adult. Pat yourself on the back now and again. You deserve that glass of wine!

Words of Wisdom
Each day of our lives we make deposits in the memory banks of our children.
  ~Charles R. Swindoll, The Strong Family

4. Getting involved

So, what is all this fuss about “Quality Time?” What is it and do you do it?

Here is a little quiz to see if you are really involved actively in your child's life.

     •Can you name all your child’s best friends?
     • Do you know your child's favourite activity?
     • Do you know what book they love?
     • Can you name your child's heroes, in sport, films, music or on TV?
     • Do you know, when your child is happy, sad, lonely, or anxious?

If you don't know the answers to these questions perhaps you need to get more involved in your child’s life. Being involved doesn’t mean smothering them and taking over their life but it does mean talking, listening, going to sport matches, piano recitals, or swimming galas when they are older and being genuinely interested in your child’s interests, tastes and life.

Research has proven that children with involved parents do better at school, feel better about themselves, have greater self-esteem and are less likely to take drugs or go off the rails. It doesn't matter how old your child is - a toddler or a teenager, they need your involvement and that means spending time with them.
Quality time isn't about what you are doing; it's about how you do it. It is state of mind, not a list of learning outcomes! It's about fully engaging, really listening, sharing a passion or interest, being relaxed and having fun. If you’d rather be somewhere else, mentally, then go! You're not spending quality time with your child. Don't be on planet "autopilot". Your child knows when you're genuinely interested. So be there mentally and physically. It's better to spend an hour fully engaged than two hours pretending. That's not what quality time is all about.

Try to become interested in what interests your child too-it’s not always about what you are interested in, or think your child should be interested in. Swap your thinking around. Be led by your child. It helps their self-esteem and maturity, and you will learn lots of new things!

Make your house the place where your kid’s friends hang out. I remember I could bring home my friends at any time (even at 2 in the morning …..if I explained!!) and they would be made to feel welcome, chatted to and made a sandwich! It felt great to be able to share a part of my life with my parents and they got to see who I was hanging around with, going out with and how nice my friends really were.
Start now while they are little.
Words of Wisdom
Happy laughter and family voices in the home will keep more kids off the streets at night than the strictest curfew.

5. Being flexible

The only time I can think of when, “one size fits all "is when I bought those cheap socks from the £ shop at Christmas and they really do stretch to fit everyone. Parenting isn't like this!

As your children grow and mature their abilities, interests, worries, and ideas change. It's true that the basics of good parenting apply to all children, but the way you implement your rules and values must bend and adapt to fit your children's age, personality, interests, and circumstances. You shouldn't change any of the fundamentals, but you must adapt them and be flexible to fit your child's character and your ever-changing family needs.

Remember

The important thing to remember is that your role as a parent changes as your child grows.

It's that simple!

What worked well when your child was in nursery won't necessarily work when they reach Junior School or is likely to succeed when they enter adolescence.

This may seem obvious to you, but you'd be surprised at how many parents I work with that refuse to change their parenting style or the language they use as their children develop and then they find themselves wondering why they are having so much difficulty using techniques that always seemed to work before.

I think it is helpful to understand that there are key developments taking place in your kids and to realise what they really mean to you as a parent.

Firstly, when your child develops from one stage to the next, he is changing on the inside as well is on the outside. Your child is not just growing in shoe size but is changing in the way they think and feel, what they think about themselves, what they are now capable of and how they relate to other people, including you!
Secondly, the psychological stages of development that children go through are reasonably predictable and so that makes it easier to anticipate. The strange thing is, most parents make a special effort to learn how to parent during the early years, but they don't expend so much energy on the pre-school years, pre-teen or the adolescent stages and just put their head in the sand until problems arise.

Don't make that mistake!

Learn about each stage of development, before your child gets there, so you can remain prepared and flexible to the changes.

Thirdly, remember children are all unique and develop at their own pace and speed and you can't rush them through a particular phase. Sometimes they take two steps forward and three steps back!
Fourthly, remember your children are developing and changing -therefore, so are you!

Enjoy the opportunities being presented to you - don't see them as necessarily a negative experience. Grow, develop, and discover together!

The drive and independence that is making your three-year-olds say "no" all the time is the same process making your 13-year-old daughter argumentative at the dinner table, but it is also making her more inquisitive in the classroom.

Embrace the wider implications of your child’s actions. It's all about getting "inside" the mind of your child at their particular age. It's all about EMPATHY.

Remember

Parenting is not about winning and losing-it’s about helping your child develop self-confidence in a healthy, balanced way. Sometimes it is about you changing, stepping back, and being mature and magnanimous. It is about you, staying flexible.

Adjusting your parenting style to match your children's temperament is also a useful tool in your toolkit of parenting skills.

Don’t fight your child's temperament, celebrate, and work with it to create a happy, relaxed, self-confident child, comfortable with their own temperament.

I think it helps to remember that children don't develop in straight lines as growing up is a gradual process. It is worth remembering that a lot of development occurs in spurts. Sometimes your child is developing psychologically in sprints-they rest and recover, then they sprint ahead again racing, resting, and recovering again.

Many people describe raising a child like a bird getting ready to fly, or a boat being built, ready to be launched. Whatever your analogy it is what your job as a parent is really all about creating a healthy, happy, self-confident, independent adult.
Words of Wisdom
“There are only two lasting bequests, we can give our children. One is roots, the other wings." Hodding Carter

The issue here is not whether your role as a parent will change, it has to, because your child's development demands it. Accepting change and your changing role is one of the hardest things, you will ever have to do as a parent, but it is one of the most important. It is one of the many aspects of building self-confidence for your child.

6. Setting boundaries and having rules.

One of the most important things children need from you is love but it is also structure.

Some of the parents I work with don’t want to repeat the strict upbringing that they experienced so they go the other way and have no rules or boundaries at all - then they wonder why their children don’t listen to them, respect them or why they feel so exhausted all the time.

I remember working with a lovely Mum who had two children - one of them was the new arrival and the 3-year-old used to play merry hell around bath time and bedtime running, around the house when the baby was in the bath being washed by Mum. Mum had had a very strict, controlling upbringing and she didn’t want to instil that fear and tight control onto her kids.

I asked her to step into the shoes of her 3-year-old and tell me what she saw. The reply was instant and immediate “He thinks I’m a push over.” and she burst into tears. We chatted about it and how she’d like it to be and within half an hour we had sorted out her new balanced way of giving her son the boundaries he needed to get ready for bed. She felt back in control and much, much happier.

Children thrive on routine and rules. Like everything in life-it’s a balance, and structure makes children feel that security of love around them.

If your child feels insecure, they'll be reluctant to try new challenges because children are very sensitive, and they need your unconditional love and protection to give them that security.

The real reason for having rules and setting boundaries is that over time your children learn to set their own and to manage their own behaviour. Although it sounds weird, your child’s ability to be controlled by you leads to their ability to control themselves. So, the rules you set and teach your kids shape the rules they live by later in life.

So, choose carefully.

Just be firm, fair, consistent and clear in what your rules are so the whole family know what they are and just stick to them consistently - remembering to adapt them occasionally when your kids have outgrown some of them.

The world is full of dangers and temptations but, sooner or later, your child will have to deal with the world without your parental help. Let go slowly and take into account the maturity and personality of your child.
Freedoms are won over time, so try to be flexible and compromise - but keep your child safe at all costs. It's not realistic to allow a 9-year-old to spend the day over at a friend's house if her parents are out - even if “everyone else's mum allows them to.”

Accept that it’s normal for your child to push your boundaries and to test you but if you have your child’s best interest at heart stick with it. Society, school, and your child will ultimately thank you.

7. Being consistent

The biggest single contributor to kid’s disciplinary problems is inconsistent parenting.

I know you’re probably thinking “Well being consistent is easy to say, but hard to do” but the secret is keeping your expectations clear and always meeting the same behaviour with the same reaction.

It doesn’t matter whether you use stickers, the naughty step, time-out in their bedroom, loss of TV time or whatever is your choice of discipline but make sure you enforce your rules and expectations with total consistency.

Here’s my positive take on encouraging kids to do the right thing – the naughty step doesn’t teach your child anything but my Easy Peasy – Lemon Squeezy Button encourages and rewards the behaviour you want to see more of and is fun!

The Sue Atkins Alternative to the ‘Naughty Step’

I was getting things ready for my ‘Can Do Kid Workshop’ which is designed to help children feel good about themselves & to build their long-term inner confidence, when I decided to record my own voice saying “That Was Easy Peasy Lemon Squeezy!” on a simple talking button that the kids push.

It’s a really simple, easy and brilliant way to ‘anchor’ confidence in a child’s unconscious as it attaches doing new things and having a go, to feelings of success, as it builds confidence and self-esteem instantly through just having fun and being relaxed. The kids just run over and push their “That Was Easy Peasy Lemon Squeezy!” button and laugh!

An ‘anchor’ is when your mood changes in response to some trigger or stimulus and your unconscious registers it every time you see it, hear it or feel it.

It’s a bit like wanting cake, when you are watching ‘The Great British Bake Off’ on TV or like jumping up at a party when your favourite song comes on that reminds you of going to college, someone’s birthday or a romance that became “your song.”

Building and anchoring confidence with the “That Was Easy Peasy Lemon Squeezy!” button sounding out loud and clear is funny, and it is a wonderfully positive experience for kids. They LOVE pressing it.
So just imagine that your family had my “That Was Easy Peasy Lemon Squeezy!” button in your kitchen and your kids ran over and pressed it anytime they did something new, overcame something difficult, did something they found unpleasant, tried something out of their comfort zone, did as they were told the first time of you asking, or just had a go as a ‘Can Do Kid.’

Just think of the power to their confidence as they learnt their 7x tables, learnt to tie their shoelaces or use the potty, ate their broccoli, did their homework, answered the phone and took a message, tidied their room, put away their toys, read their reading book or emptied the dishwasher! – the list is endless and only limited by your imagination and pressed my “That Was Easy Peasy Lemon Squeezy!” button.

What a wonderfully simple way to boost your child’s self-esteem and develop their “have a go” mentality or what I like to call ‘The Can Do’ mindset so important to success in Life.

Just imagine if families started to do this fun thing from the moment their kids were little….. just think how much more relaxed, optimistic, and happy kids would be.

Just think, you could use it too when you didn’t shout, didn’t nag or got something right with your kids or when you did something new for the first time too, like struggling with the frustration over online banking, speaking up at a meeting or salsa dancing!!!

Why don’t you get one for your kitchen, office, classroom or nursery?…….. and you can ALL have fun making life, learning and living easier .

Wouldn’t it be wonderful if all nurseries, schools, colleges, gymnastics clubs, dance clubs, sport’s clubs all had my “That Was Easy Peasy Lemon Squeezy!” button too?

This is brilliant fun and a very, very easy way to build your child’s self-esteem and self-confidence !
NO MORE ‘Naughty Step’ which is a negative way to motivate your kids – try my “That Was Easy Peasy Lemon Squeezy!” approach to raising happy, confident, resilient kids

Let’s start a movement for confident ‘Can Do’ kids that’s simple, fun and ‘Easy Peasy Lemon Squeezy!’

Put in Peanut 25 to get 25% discount for being a 
Toddler Roadmap Podcast listener!!! 

If you are having trouble disciplining your child the first thing you should do is take a step back and ask yourself, “Am I being consistent?”

There are many reasons why parents become inconsistent but one of the main ones I see is stress and tiredness. In today’s hectic and frenetic world, we all get tired and that’s when we feel like giving in or can’t quite find the energy to take on the battle or argument that’s probably going to ensue - it’s easy to get distracted or lose our focus.

It’s also true if you are going through a major change like going back to work, going through a divorce, moving house, or bonding a new stepfamily together.

It’s easier to be consistent if you have routines because consistency in routines breeds consistency in your parenting. When life is unpredictable it’s easy to get distracted.

A lot of parents I chat with ask whether it’s important to maintain a united front in their discipline, and the simple answer is that it depends on your child’s age. Younger children need a totally united front, so they know where they are, as they see the world in black and white.

8. Encouraging Independence

From the day you play “peek-a-boo” with your baby, you are preparing them for separation from you. It is a process. From their first day at school, their first sleepover, their first school trip to France, to the day they leave home; it is a step-by-step gradual moving out into the big world, confident and independent from you.

Remember

Your child needs a mixture of freedom and constraints, guidance and trust.

It’s a fine line but good parenting requires a balance between involvement and independence and your child learns self-confidence from learning to manage their own self-sufficiency.

Try asking yourself these three questions to help develop your child’s independence.

     • Does my child have the capabilities to handle this situation, or make this decision on their own?
     • If my child handles this on their own successfully, will they come away feeling better about themselves   or will they have learned something important as a result?
     • If my child makes a mistake, will the consequences be something we can all live with in the long run?

Parents, who encourage independence in their children, help them to develop a sense of self-direction. To be successful in life, children need both self-control and self-direction. They also need self-discipline to balance their own individual needs with the needs of others.

It is perfectly normal, for your kids to push for autonomy and to push the boundaries. It's not always about rebelliousness and disobedience. It is about your child's need to feel in control of their own lives and not feel constantly controlled by someone else. Children need to feel a mixture of freedom and restrictions.

Remember

Children need to feel attached emotionally to their parents but also separate from them.

9. Being firm and fair in your discipline.

It’s really important at each stage of your child’s development to establish your rules that you expect your child to obey and to expect that they will at some point challenge you and test your limits. It’s just what kids do.

But one of the important things you must remember is that it’s your job to do what’s best for your child whether they like it or not. You are the adult; you are the more experienced, wiser person with the bigger picture.

So don’t let your toddler blackmail you into buying that ice cream just before lunch by their screaming tantrum, don’t let your 12-year-old get away with not changing her shirt after a netball match because it smells just because you can’t face her mood, don’t let your teenager get away with not emptying the dishwasher because you can’t bear his sulky behaviour as he does it.

Their judgement isn’t as good as yours.

You are building an adult - tomorrow’s future generation so stand your ground.

You are there to help them gain responsibility, autonomy and self-sufficiency so when you are right, be firm.

I know it’s easier sometimes to give in, particularly when you’re tired but a child who knows they have the upper hand makes your life a misery in the long run and you are teaching them that it’s ok to be petulant, demanding and sulky - which of course it’s not.

Also, it sends the message that your rules don’t matter, aren’t that important anyway and you’re views and beliefs aren’t important either. You look weak.

Some parents I have worked with don’t like their kids to be angry with them. But being your child’s friend is not what being parent is all about. Parenting is about being a parent not a friend, mate or pal. I don’t like it when my daughter gets angry with me but it’s much better that she is temporarily cross with me but goes to bed at a reasonable time so she can get up cheerfully the next morning than like me all the time.

I’m not saying that you have rules just for the sake of them or insist on them come hell or high water as you are “the boss,” but you want your child to see your authority as coming from your wisdom and good judgement and by being firm and fair and flexible you are giving your kids security and love.
Just remember to adapt your rules when your children outgrow them.

10. Listening first, talking later.

Listening is the best gift you can give anyone. It is also the best gift you can give your kids. It makes them feel valued, heard and understood. It makes them feel important.

Through listening properly to your children, you help them find their own answers. They also let off steam, and if you ask the odd great question, they start to see things from a different perspective.

So, turn down the TV, stop reading the paper, stop peeling the potatoes. Look at your child and give them your full attention.

Listen with genuine interest and really pay attention to what they are telling you about. Keep an open mind, don't judge, or interrupt them. You know how frustrating it is when your friend or partner interrupts you, half listens or just says “ aaahh ha” now and again to placate you so don’t do it to your kids - they deserve better.

Remember

We have two ears and only one mouth for a reason!

Respecting your child.

Your relationship with your toddler is the foundation of their relationships with others. If you treat your child with compassion, kindness, and respect, they will grow up to be concerned about others, caring, considerate and respectful towards people too. If you are uncaring, rude, and dismissive, it’s very likely that’s how they will turn out to be when they are grown up.
Words of wisdom
“The key to your family culture is how you treat the child who tests you the most." Stephen R. Covey

Respect is the key energy of a good family, as it brings everyone together. It creates a strong family unit that can handle whatever challenges are thrown at it like divorce, bereavement, redundancy or any of life's ups and downs. When a parent shows respect and unconditional love to the most difficult child in the family (at that time!) it creates trust and the whole family learns this culture as well.

Families don't die from their setbacks, but they can wither and die from a negative, sarcastic, taunting or guilt-ridden culture within a family.

When your child speaks or acts in a way that is disrespectful, the first question you should ask yourself is,” Why do I think my child did this?" Not, "How can I make my child respect me."

Take a minute and think:

How do I show respect to my children? 

Toddlers, just like us, want to be heard. They want their point of view valued, not corrected.

Part of respecting a child is also allowing them to act their age and to allow them to enjoy being at their stage of development. Let them laugh, play, be silly, be boisterous, be messy and get dirty, see the world through their wonderful eyes of awe and wonder and innocence. It's about living life in the present and enjoying the journey.

And finally ….. here is an exercise that I use on my personal coaching programmes
Just find a quiet place to sit and relax for the next 10 minutes where you won’t be disturbed and breathe deeply and slowly….

The Rocking Chair Visualisation

I want you to imagine you’re well into your 90’s; your children have grown up and had families of their own. Picture this very clearly in your mind. You can close your eyes if you want to and breathe very deeply and slowly and relax all your muscles as you do this. Imagine you’re surrounded by your wonderful family.

     ● How does that feel?
     ● What would your son or daughter say is the best thing about having you as a Mum or Dad?
     ● What do they love most about you?
     ● How do they describe you to their children?
     ● How do you want them to describe you to their children?
     ● How would that make you feel?
     ● What steps can you take to make sure that happens?
     ● If you could ask your future self just one question, what would it be?
     ● What would be the answer?
     ● What have been the highlights and great moments in your family relationships over the years? Now think about your children, grown up with their own children?
    ● What kind of parent do you want them to be?
    ● What values do you want them to demonstrate?
    ● When they look back at their childhood, what do you want them to remember?
    ● What memories have you built in them that will last forever?
    ● What wonderful stories about their childhood will they share with their own children?
    ● What steps can you take from now on to make sure that happens?

Enjoy these lovely thoughts and pictures and as you become more aware of your feet on the floor here in the room take the learning from these lovely experiences back with you now - so you can make sure all these dreams come true for you all easily from today.

And open your eyes and stretch your body and give yourself a little shake.

To Close

Being a confident and loving parent is the gift you give your toddlers and as they grow, develop and mature and it is the gift you give your children.

You guide, nudge, protect and teach your children no matter how old they are as it is a never-ending adventure and journey of discovery.

And amongst the many gifts you give your children allowing them to become independent, individual and their true selves - happy, confident and well-behaved is the greatest gift of all.

I really hope you’ve found the Toddler Roadmap Podcasts positive and helpful on your journey through the toddler years.

Come and join me on my website at www.theSueAtkins.com to keep in touch and download my articles, blogs, podcasts, videos and my newsletters to keep you inspired on your parenting journey from toddler to teen.

Check out my YouTube Parenting Channel: A New Video is released every Tuesday and Friday where you can learn how to raise happy, confident and resilient children.

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One Last Thing

May I ask you a favour?

If you have got anything out of this course, if you highlighted or circled or post-it-noted, or had a "Aha" moment, I'm hoping you'll do something for me.
Tell someone else.

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Here’s to your family’s happiness

Watch my videos, listen to my MP3s and read my modules in my FULL TODDLER ROADMAP 
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I have filmed and written tips for Disney’s ‘The Gift of Play’ website. Get inspired and spark the magic of imaginative play with my tips & videos in collaboration with Disney, Pixar, Star Wars™ and Marvel.

Bursting with inspirational play ideas, arts, crafts, games, activities and puzzles!

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#ParentHacks

#ParentHacks for Hot Days ☀️
Keep a spray bottle in the car for hot days to avoid your toddler touching scorching seat belts & buckles!
Spray them before your little one climbs in 🚘

Whether you are in the middle of potty training, have a child with additional needs, are handling a monosyllabic teen, or need the magic formula to co-parent with your ex, one thing is certain:

You Want Answers 😊

With the overwhelming amount of information on the internet and the massive amounts of parenting books that make their way on to Amazon, it’s nearly impossible to sift through the online bookshelves to find the help you need quickly and easily.

As an author myself, I get asked all the time, ‘Sue, what are your favourite parenting books?’
From general parenting advice to tackling specific struggles, this list of books will help you navigate many of the parenting issues you’re facing. with confidence.

You can be sure that each one is fantastic and will be worth your time.

Reading is a fundamental part of growing up – so from sturdy board books, to books that help your children explore, understand and express their emotions, to reading for fun, you will find a whole world of great books in my Book Club to accompany your children on their journey through life too.

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Sue Atkins Toddler Roadmap Community
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Question:

Dear Sue, we’ve got my sister’s wedding to go to in August but I’m panicking about Sam and how he’ll cope – he’s only two and half and it’ll be a long - but hopefully fun day for everyone! Any suggestions to help make sure it goes well? 

Robyn McMillian, Chester, England 

Answer:

Toddlers are bundles of fun, energy and curiosity , but trying to keep your toddler quiet in public spaces like in ceremonies, weddings, funerals or graduations can be hard on your toddler and stressful for you!

Here’s a couple of Quick Tips:

     • Sit closer to the front.

Choose a seat near the front for your event. We found the closer we sat to the front of the event the better the kid’s behaviour. Remember that to a toddler or young child, they are more interested if they can SEE what is going on, not just hear it.

When you sit in the back it’s hard to pay attention to anything relevant back there and they tend to act up more, get naughty & mess about, because they’re not engaged in what’s happening.

     • Pre-empt the ‘Ants in their Pants’ with Frequent Walks Take a small one-minute-walk every ten minutes or so during the event to help them move! Toddlers are not designed to sit still for long! Take it in turns.

     • Provide a Quiet Box

Have a “quiet box” that you fill with special toys just for special occasions. Rotate the toys and add new ones that are cheap to buy, but fun for your toddler.

Special Sticker Books for Special Occasions One thing that usually worked for us was sticker books and just hand them a few at a time as otherwise they just put them any old where too quickly!

Bring a rucksack packed with activities, like some favourite books, a colouring book with shiny gel pens, a few favourite toys & simple snacks to keep little hands & minds busy!
Let your little one run about outside after the event to let off some steam.

     • Encourage instead of Discourage.

Whatever you decide, remember that you are teaching your children in everything that you do.
Encourage them with gentle reminders to be still and listen. Don’t get stressed and angry that won’t help.

Remember that they are only young children, and they really don’t have the attention span for an hour-long event.

Frequent breaks and distractions are going to be your best bet, as they learn to sit quietly.
Don’t feel judged by other people - like everything in life with kids it’s a ‘teaching & learning’ moment for them … and you !

Hope that helps🎈

For more practical information for raising happy, confident toddlers go to


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Everything you need to raise a happy, confident, resilient toddler

Parentverse 

On the Parentverse: Sue is in Conversation with Laura Godfrey- Isaacs Author of ‘Maternal Journal: A creative guide to journaling through pregnancy, birth and beyond’ to promote positive mental health and wellbeing in pregnancy, birth and parenthood.

Pause to Ponder This Week:

What are your thoughts on stickers and sticker charts?

Time To Take Action

My Toddler Roadmap looks at all the aspects of raising your toddler so they are not damaged by a unique time in history - living through a pandemic - & each module will help you to nurture your child’s mental health and wellbeing and this podcast is linked to my Toddler Roadmap training.

I’m going to hold your hand, support and guide you through everything you need to know about raising happy, confident resilient kids – today’s toddlers but tomorrow’s adults!
I want you to relax & have total confidence that you’ve got a parenting expert who’s got your back - showing you the way to happy, confident kids and knowing the pandemic didn’t damage your kids long term!

In my TODDLER Roadmap Course and Community I will give you the step by step guide for handling toddler tantrums and why they happen, I give you the roadmap for potty training, why kids become fussy eaters and what to do about it. I show you how to build self confidence in your toddler and explain why they say ‘why?’ all the time, I give you my parenting hacks on how to handle sibling rivalry when another baby arrives, I tell you about the importance of play and how to handle when they say ‘NO!’

I tell you how to handle whining, crying, and biting. I show you my tips for getting kids into a good bedtime routine and why that’s important. I talk about why reading with kids is so important and why singing nursery rhymes with them helps their language development. I show you how to handle night terrors and I look at the bigger picture to your parenting – not just the socks and pants of life that we all get stuck in!

So, I’m really excited to share with you my Toddler Roadmap

Check out my YouTube Channel Playlist – videos released every Tuesday and Friday

Remember, if you want to review what we’ve talked about, check out the full Show Notes

There, you can find a full article on the topic, videos that summarise the different elements and links to any tools or resources we’ve pointed out. You can also drop us a comment there and get involved in the conversation.
You can find a full article on the topic, videos that summarise the different elements and links to any tools or resources we’ve pointed out. You can also drop us a comment there and get involved in the conversation. 
To get my full advice and videos join my Toddler Roadmap

Join my Facebook Group Community

I have created a private and safe space for us all – a Facebook Group called ‘Don’t Stew ~ Ask Sue Atkins’ where you can ask me anything from niggles, worries, or problems or perhaps you’d just like some new ideas or you’d like to make some new friends.

Jump on and join in – it’s free from finger pointing or tut-tting – it takes a village and we’re all in this together!
It’s like a community clubhouse – to make sure we get together to chat, laugh and support each other on the journey – so grab a coffee and let’s get social 😊
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