They love to make choices and they love to reject what you tell them to do! Also by rejecting one of their parents, i.e. Mum or Dad, is just one of the ways they can exercise a little control and show their power.
While rejecting you may make you feel sad, upset, or unimportant, it’s usually a temporary whim and they don't really mean they don't love you or want you in their life. They really want more power and control at a stage when they get frustrated with being bossed around and controlled by the big people around them all day!
It's important that when this happens that you don’t take it personally. Toddlers change their minds all the time from wanting the red beaker one day to having a meltdown if it’s the red beaker the next day!
These things don't mean they really hate you. They just mean that they are struggling with learning to control their big emotions.
Step back and press your imaginary ‘pause button’ that I talk a lot about in my Toddler Roadmap training www.ToddlerRoadmap.com and think about how you can give them a sense of having more independence and a feeling of capability and control over some aspects of their lives – from choosing the colour of their socks to whether they want to cuddle their teddy or truck!
Where can you offer more limited choices to help them feel more independent?
So much of parenting a toddler is turning their rejection, tantrums and opposition into fun and games.
Toddlers are just learning what is serious and what isn't. They don't know that it may break your heart if they tell you they don't want you to read to them.
There's no point in trying to make them feel guilty for something they can't help doing anyway. So relax, don’t sweat the small stuff and wait for this phase to pass!